Sometimes people surprise you.
After dealing with the extremely rude office staff yesterday, I emailed my doctor. I didn't out and out say what a horror the woman was, but I said, "unfriendly and unhelpful". Oh well. Needless to say, he writes back, apologizes for them, takes full responsibility and will be having a chat with them later on. Nice. :-)
On a separate topic--yesterday was a bit rough for me. Besides dealing with idiot office staff, I occasionally have to deal with idiot co-workers. Let me say this: I love my job, I love my boss and I love about 80 percent of the people I work with. It's the 20 that is driving me up a wall these days. Some people are neverhappy, they love to complain, they think it's their job to give everyone "feedback" (which is just cattiness disgused as criticism to help you "improve") on every little thing that they do and it's just so frustrating.
A lot of people work with an agenda. I don't. I may talk about work an awful lot, but I certainly don't spend my day plotting and thinking about "why are they ahead of me"? Because seriously--I DON'T CARE. I go there to do work, do a good job, the intermitent "good work!" is great, but I'm not gunning for anyone's job, or to be anyone's boss or anything. It's just not where my energies are. I know that I'm just trying to make the most of the time I have on the planet. But other people want to spend their time trying to figure out how to bring you down and then I have to waste my energy, my time, my thoughts, my everything, to deal with this. Then I get stressed. And then I get upset that I'm stressed. And then, all anyone sees is not my strength, not my "I can do this" attitude, they see my tears, my frustration, my mini-breakdown, cause man, everyone has their breaking points and sometimes I'm just not up to hanlde the stress, because there is such a thing as too much.
My boss says that stress is a choice. I believe her--but it's also hard to escape your conditioning. I used to not pay too much credence to "feedback". Then I was told I needed to care more about what other people had to say, listen, not ignore it and use it. So I did that. Now, I'm back to the "filter" stage. But if I'm filtering I've still got to listen to that crap! And I'm telling you, when it's time for you six-month scan or your friends have been sick or whatever, listening to the petty, small things makes me want to lose it. Which I guess is just one more thing I've got to work on.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Ugh.
Okay, reading the paper this morning and it seems like it’s always a back and forth, “If you believe in blah blah blah” vote Republican or Democrat. Whatever. I don’t care about your party affiliation but what ever happened to being NICE to people. Seriously, does one party get the stake on that? Is one better at being decent and NICE to people? I honestly don’t think so. I don’t walk down the street and think, well that person looks happy so-they must be a heathen. It’s so frustrating. Political views are one thing, but try being a person who is kind and courteous and who doesn’t scream at someone for disagreeing with you, who isn’t dismissive, who doesn’t make clucking noises when you feel “crowded” by someone one the train, or make fun of someone who has a disability or at least have enough self-awareness to realize that driving an SUV and making fun of all the “liberal eco-nuts” who recycle is complete hypocrisy when you crave sandy beaches and blue water because you need to get away from the dirty city. NATURE IS WHERE YOU GO TO VACATION! I mean, I’m not saying that driving and SUV or whatever makes you any less of a person but just because someone recycles or plants trees doesn’t make them crazy. So if you don’t want to be accused of not caring, don’t yell at someone for caring too much.
I call my doc’s office to get a referral for a CT Scan. My oncologists had decided a PET/CT wasn’t necessary and that a regular CT would be fine. The receptionist was so rude, I couldn’t believe it. I mean, out and out dismissive and condescending and had the nerve to say (I couldn’t make this up), “Can you please explain to me again WHY you’re calling me?” I don’t understand some people sometimes. I’m a heathen because I’m pro-choice but you’re a good person who thinks that telling someone that they’re not worth your time when they need to get checked for re-occurrence simply because you vote another way? That’s what this has come down to? “Guiding moral principles” are generally subjective—you’re no more evil just because you can’t say that you have blind faith in something if it’s simply not what you believe in but volunteer on weekends because you want to help those that you can have a conversation with. We’re all different and yet we fight so much to have people think the same way we do. It’s very frustrating. We teach kids to “celebrate diversity” but at the same time we lambaste it in the media. It’s terrible.
Here’s the truth: cancer is the universal equalizer. It can strike at any time, any place, any religion, any faith (cause they are not one in the same), any gender, any age, any race, any location on the globe, those who are good, those who are bad, pedophiles, pastors, moms, singletons, women who have had abortions, those who are opposed, recyclers, bicyclers, SUV drivers, blondes, brunettes, red-heads, blue eyes, brown eyes, green eyes, those who have lived charmed lives, those who have seen so much tragedy, couch potatoes, exercisers, vegetarians, meat-lovers, carb addicts, carb avengers, Democrats, Republicans, Libertarians, whatever, you’re not immune.
So maybe, just maybe, we can just all work on being nicer. Being more kind and caring. Not finding the differences as an excuse to be rude and say unkind things to each other. Because I’ll tell you this much—if you can save my life, I don’t care if you worship eggs or think that the President should have his face carved into a mountain. If you care enough to make me better, then I’m sure we can come to some sort of compromise.
Okay, reading the paper this morning and it seems like it’s always a back and forth, “If you believe in blah blah blah” vote Republican or Democrat. Whatever. I don’t care about your party affiliation but what ever happened to being NICE to people. Seriously, does one party get the stake on that? Is one better at being decent and NICE to people? I honestly don’t think so. I don’t walk down the street and think, well that person looks happy so-they must be a heathen. It’s so frustrating. Political views are one thing, but try being a person who is kind and courteous and who doesn’t scream at someone for disagreeing with you, who isn’t dismissive, who doesn’t make clucking noises when you feel “crowded” by someone one the train, or make fun of someone who has a disability or at least have enough self-awareness to realize that driving an SUV and making fun of all the “liberal eco-nuts” who recycle is complete hypocrisy when you crave sandy beaches and blue water because you need to get away from the dirty city. NATURE IS WHERE YOU GO TO VACATION! I mean, I’m not saying that driving and SUV or whatever makes you any less of a person but just because someone recycles or plants trees doesn’t make them crazy. So if you don’t want to be accused of not caring, don’t yell at someone for caring too much.
I call my doc’s office to get a referral for a CT Scan. My oncologists had decided a PET/CT wasn’t necessary and that a regular CT would be fine. The receptionist was so rude, I couldn’t believe it. I mean, out and out dismissive and condescending and had the nerve to say (I couldn’t make this up), “Can you please explain to me again WHY you’re calling me?” I don’t understand some people sometimes. I’m a heathen because I’m pro-choice but you’re a good person who thinks that telling someone that they’re not worth your time when they need to get checked for re-occurrence simply because you vote another way? That’s what this has come down to? “Guiding moral principles” are generally subjective—you’re no more evil just because you can’t say that you have blind faith in something if it’s simply not what you believe in but volunteer on weekends because you want to help those that you can have a conversation with. We’re all different and yet we fight so much to have people think the same way we do. It’s very frustrating. We teach kids to “celebrate diversity” but at the same time we lambaste it in the media. It’s terrible.
Here’s the truth: cancer is the universal equalizer. It can strike at any time, any place, any religion, any faith (cause they are not one in the same), any gender, any age, any race, any location on the globe, those who are good, those who are bad, pedophiles, pastors, moms, singletons, women who have had abortions, those who are opposed, recyclers, bicyclers, SUV drivers, blondes, brunettes, red-heads, blue eyes, brown eyes, green eyes, those who have lived charmed lives, those who have seen so much tragedy, couch potatoes, exercisers, vegetarians, meat-lovers, carb addicts, carb avengers, Democrats, Republicans, Libertarians, whatever, you’re not immune.
So maybe, just maybe, we can just all work on being nicer. Being more kind and caring. Not finding the differences as an excuse to be rude and say unkind things to each other. Because I’ll tell you this much—if you can save my life, I don’t care if you worship eggs or think that the President should have his face carved into a mountain. If you care enough to make me better, then I’m sure we can come to some sort of compromise.
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