I think that a lot of people have the mistaken impression of what strength is. I have a lot of friends who never ever discuss their feelings. Every time you ask them about it, they give you that Pollyanna b.s. that feels the need to spin everything in the most positive way OR they say nothing and cite their inability to talk about it.

Well, here's my take on strength. It takes a very confident and strong person to admit that they need to talk--to discuss their fears of dying, of how overwhelmed they are, how scared they are, how much they don't know, etc. Keeping it all to yourself does not make you strong--it means that no one can know you, no one can help you and you are making sure that you are going to crack under the pressure.

And also really think about why you are afraid of opening up. Is it because you have people in your life who can't just listen--but take every remark you make as an opportunity to give their opinion? Or every time you have a reaction you're surrounded by people who also give their feedback on how you reacted wrong or how they would react? Is it just hard to have an honest emotion because you're afraid of how you'll be judged?

I speak from a place of experience on this one. For some reason, I think a lot of us offer judgement without realizing it. I recently got a new car. Someone said to me, "Cute but I don't really like two doors." Automatically, I did not want to talk about the car with them anymore. That remark alone made me shut down. It was encased in a negative comment and a judgemental vibe. And it goes for a lot of things in life, "I know you feel like what's happening to you isn't fair, but you know, it's just life and sometimes you have to accept it." Again--it'll lead to complete shut down. Every time we make a choice (a doctor, a treatment, a hospital, a vacation) do we need commentary? Do we need to question, feel invalidated at every turn and then start leading to emotional shutdown that is definitely detrimental to our well-being?

Don't feel the need to look for the silver lining in EVERY FRIGGIN SITUATION. If you have a co-worker that sucks--they suck. Plain and simple. No need to constantly be thankful that you even have a job--particularly if this person regardless of your efforts winds up consistently ruining your day. You can be pissed, annoyed and irritated that this person is basically making your 45 hour week in an office a bit unbearable. Because the truth of the matter is, that sometimes these people are toxic and no matter how Zen-like you try to be, they can really make you tired, sick and affect your work. And it might be a situation you can't change--so I say, don't feel like you have to be thankful for the other things, complain about how much they suck to a friend who'll let you vent without making you feel bad about it. It'll be your first step into emotional freedom because you've found a safe place to let it all out. And yes, it's a fine line between constant complaining and discussing your frustration and I walk that fine line every day (and often step off of it) but it's better than putting it somewhere else. Because eventually you'll get to the place that you want to be.

If you are dealing with doctors who are rude and impolite and standoffish--DO NOT think that you have to say, "Well, they're doing a great job with my body" because your heart and your soul are part of that, and if they feel that they are above taking care of those two things, then you'll never feel free to be completley honest with them and you've effectively done yourself a major disservice.