Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Saying the right thing. It’s so much harder than I thought it would be. And I’ve learned I have very little patience for people who say the completely wrong thing.

For instance, I was talking with my mother today. A friend of mine may have a serious condition and I was a little upset about it. She goes, “Why did she even tell you if she wasn’t sure what it was yet. Why didn’t she just wait?” And I’m all like, what the hell does that mean? And she proceeded to tell me that ofcourse, she would wait until she was certain before unloading that on “someone like me”. Which put me through the roof. And I was like, “What the hell does that mean? Because I would think that if you had a friend who had been through a serious illness, that that would be the first person that you turned to because they would understand. So, now people are supposed to avoid telling me unpleasant news because at one point in time I was sick and they should only tell me things if they’re certain?”

She had no reply and she just couldn’t answer, just kept going on and on and about how what this person did (by telling me, mind you) was inconsiderate and wrong and blah blah blah and I had to say to her, “You know what? You’re making this worse. I have to go.”

I’m sorry, I love my mother, but I’m going to disagree with her here. But at the same time, I don’t know if I should take her advice. So, when I feel sick or if the doctor tells me, “I’m going to do some tests” I should just not tell anyone? Just kind of go through that alone? Wait and see what comes down the pike? Keep it all in? Be scared and nervous and just say, “Well, I mean I’m a nervous wreck and talking about this with someone might help but since I’m not 100% sure what’s going on, I’m going to keep it to myself”. Which I’ve been accused of doing. And told not to do. I don’t know, I don’t like to be thought of as fragile, as not being able to handle certain things. Not true!

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